Anyone else enjoy teasing Amazon support?

Amazon make it so difficult to talk to anyone when things go wrong, but get your own back by having some fun…

Me: Hi, this should be delivered today but it hasn’t even been marked as dispatched

Amazon: Hello, My name is Amazon. I will be happy to help you today.
Amazon: Thank you for verifying your account.
I am sorry to know that your order did not dispatched yet, please do not worry I will surely look into this for you.

Me: thanks

Amazon: Please confirm is this the item name?
SONGMICS Winged Folding Clothes Airer, 16 Metre Drying Space, Laundry Drying Rack, Multifunctional Air Dryer, Stainless Steel Tubes Silver LLR502

Me: yes that’s the one
my girlfriend is waiting for it so she can hang our laundry out
we expected it today and so we have a large load of clothes that are wet

Amazon: Thank you for the confirmation.
Do you mind waiting a few moments while I look into this for you?

Me: no problem

Amazon: Thank you.
I’m still working on this. I’ll be a moment longer.

Me: ok :slight_smile:

Amazon: Thank you so much for waiting and I really appreciate your patience.
I’ve checked your order, and have found that the item was delayed in dispatched, I’ve now escalated this to the fulfilment centre that is dispatching your goods to help solve the problem.
Your order will dispatch the item as soon as possible.If there is a faster shipping method available we will also automatically upgrade the parcel to help get it to you that bit sooner.

Me: that’s very disappointing, are you saying it won’t get here today?

Amazon: The item was in shipping soon status and it will be dispatched shortly and make delivered to your address by today itself.

Me: it will come today?
we have a big load of wet laundry

Amazon: Yes it will come today.

Me: that’s great because i’ve hurt my leg, so i can’t help her go out to dry it

Amazon: I am really sorry to hear about that please do not worry your item will be deliver by then.

Me: thanks, we’ll put another load on then

Amazon: I appreciate your patience, cooperation and understanding in this matter.
Apart from this is there anything else I can help you with?

Me: no that’s all thanks
unless you know how to fix my leg

Amazon: You’re most welcome. It was my pleasure assisting you. Please click the “End Chat” link to close this window.
Have a great "Easter day"ahead
Bye and take care.

(There’s no way it will be delivered today! She disappeared a bit quick, I was going to ask her to come help hang the washing out)


I wouldn’t be so sure, given the drive Amazon have to ‘optimize’ their sales flow. If you have an Amazon driver working today near you, you could get your order (at a price).

Parcels going to residential addresses might be delivered on Sundays and some UK Bank Holidays.
One-Day Delivery and Premium Delivery - Amazon Customer Service

Still not marked as dispatched…

Well have another go tomorrow and see if you can get a discount :rofl:

Surprised they didn’t give you another free month of prime, that’s normally the default response to any problem ever.


Not to brag, but I’m up to £49 back on my 6 months Prime free trial!

Will call tomorrow to see what they say. I screen shot the convo where she promises it will be here today :slight_smile:

When you call where is the call routed? There is like an extreme delay and the strangest accent on the other end

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I’ve usually been using chat these days, I invariably get an Indian sounding name with limited english skills, but also with a positive attitude and generally trying to solve the problem within their authority.

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I used to until I started helping out with customer support at Monzo

Now I really feel for them :laughing:


I’ve never felt the need to wind up monzo support - you make it extremely easy to contact you when we need help.

Amazon have been taking lessons from the Vogons - the contact page is buried 3 layers deep in soft peat.

As expected the item wasn’t delivered yesterday, today they extended my prime by a month but I couldn’t get him to come help hang the washing out.


Try sending it to MONZO FREEPOST. :joy:


@anon72173902 are you writing @anarchist’s jokes? :wink:

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I don’t get it

So did the washing get hung to dry…?

A similar thing happened to me a few months ago.

I order a cheeseboard set. Because it came with knives and was coming from outside the UK, it got stuck in customs. Despite its status as awaiting dispatch I had to call them which escalated into a 3 day investigation.

At one point I’d amassed 18 months of free Prime from complaining every time a Prime delivery didn’t turn up on time!