Its national tell a joke day!

General Chat
1

Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side

7 Likes
2

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they’re very good at it!

2 Likes
3

What goes “ooooooooh”?
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A cow with no lips :grin:

7 Likes
4

What’s a pilots favourite flavour of crisps?

Plain

1 Like
5

An SQL query walks in a bar, goes to two tables and says “may I join you?”

4 Likes
6

Revolut Customer Support

8 Likes
7

A man walked into a bar

Ouch.

2 Likes
8

What’s green, lives in a field and has 4,000 legs?

Grass. It was a mistake about the legs.

9

I hope you are ashamed of yourself

3 Likes
10

Knock Knock!

11

Who’s there?

12

You

13

What do you call a teacher who’s always late?

Mister Bus.

2 Likes
14

Nope, not helping you finish that one :yum:

1 Like
15

NO!! I’ll never get the pay off for such a bad joke :joy:

16

What do you call a Hen looking at some lettuce.
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Chicken Caesar Salad
:chicken::green_salad:

4 Likes
17

Why cant a nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it’ll be a foot!

3 Likes
18

Northern Irish joke

Sammy Wilson falls into a coma, and remains unconscious but stable for 25 years, after which time he wakes up. His faithful friend Gregory Campbell is by his bedside, looking anxiously at him as he wakes.

“Gregory? How long have I been out?”

“25 years.”

“25 years? My god! What’s happened? What’s going on?”

“Well, do you want the bad news or the really bad news first?”

Sammy hesitates, disturbed, then says, “I suppose… give me the bad news first.”

“Gerry Adams is President of a united Ireland.”

“What? That’s terrible, how could that have… wait, if that’s the bad news, what’s the really bad news?”

“Celtic beat Rangers in the FA Cup final.”

“Oh no! But… how can that be worse… what was the score?”

“2–6 to 1–4.”

19

I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu

3 Likes
20

Four fonts walk into a bar the barman says
“Oi - get out! We don’t want your type in here”

4 Likes