Its national tell a joke day!

General Chat
#1

Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side

7 Likes
#2

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they’re very good at it!

2 Likes
#3

What goes “ooooooooh”?
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A cow with no lips :grin:

7 Likes
#4

What’s a pilots favourite flavour of crisps?

Plain

1 Like
#5

An SQL query walks in a bar, goes to two tables and says “may I join you?”

4 Likes
#6

Revolut Customer Support

8 Likes
#7

A man walked into a bar

Ouch.

2 Likes
#8

What’s green, lives in a field and has 4,000 legs?

Grass. It was a mistake about the legs.

#9

I hope you are ashamed of yourself

3 Likes
#10

Knock Knock!

#11

Who’s there?

#12

You

#13

What do you call a teacher who’s always late?

Mister Bus.

2 Likes
#14

Nope, not helping you finish that one :yum:

1 Like
#15

NO!! I’ll never get the pay off for such a bad joke :joy:

#16

What do you call a Hen looking at some lettuce.
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Chicken Caesar Salad
:chicken::green_salad:

4 Likes
#17

Why cant a nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it’ll be a foot!

3 Likes
#18

Northern Irish joke

Sammy Wilson falls into a coma, and remains unconscious but stable for 25 years, after which time he wakes up. His faithful friend Gregory Campbell is by his bedside, looking anxiously at him as he wakes.

“Gregory? How long have I been out?”

“25 years.”

“25 years? My god! What’s happened? What’s going on?”

“Well, do you want the bad news or the really bad news first?”

Sammy hesitates, disturbed, then says, “I suppose
 give me the bad news first.”

“Gerry Adams is President of a united Ireland.”

“What? That’s terrible, how could that have
 wait, if that’s the bad news, what’s the really bad news?”

“Celtic beat Rangers in the FA Cup final.”

“Oh no! But
 how can that be worse
 what was the score?”

“2–6 to 1–4.”

#19

I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu

3 Likes
#20

Four fonts walk into a bar the barman says
“Oi - get out! We don’t want your type in here”

4 Likes