Some of these silly ideas have made me laugh way more then they should have
6 Likes
I’d pay good money for that notification sound 
1 Like
This Card will Self Destruct
When you reach the £100 limit, the card spontaneously self-combusts to prevent you from overspending and keeping within your budget
2 Likes
The socialist feature
Every day the app will redistribute your wealth to all other Monzo users
This will give you a warm glow as you help all the other Monzo comrades
13 Likes
In Soviet Russia, Card Spends You
11 Likes
PepperPots
All your money is now in physical pots in your own home, you just take a picture of it and the money is added.
If you wish to take any out, the mass covering of pepper makes you sneeze so much you leave your money where it is.
2 Likes
Forget Shared Tabs , Shared Balances are here. Every time you spend on your card it messages your group chat about that expensive purchase you really didn’t need so they can shame you for you bad spending
1 Like
The capitalist feature.
Everything you do comes at a cost. But you can also monetise your money.
Every tap comes at a cost! But sell your data for additional income!
1 Like
30 minutes remaining! 
(Bakeoff voice)
7 Likes
Kieran, take your time. No one wants a soggy bottom…
Introducing Soggy Bottom; if your balance goes below £100 your phone will emit a liquid. This one simple social shaming technique will stop you ever buying too many coffees again.
5 Likes
Is it weird that I like this idea? As long as it’s toggleable
Split The Bill Plus
You create a group of everyone out for dinner, you all work out how much you’ve spent, Monzo automatically works out who has the most left in their account after they have paid for dinner and they are charged for everyones dinner.
1 Like
10 minutes remaining 
Is there any chance the announcement can be made tomorrow instead?
I’m not done with fake features yet. Don’t want to let actual news get in the way of a good speculation thread.
6 Likes
I hope it’s the business WebGUI coming to Personal accounts!
Sometimes you just want a webGUI (like a business customer)
None of Your Business Banking - the monzo app is a blank screen unless your phone is held at a very specific angle
4 Likes
CHECK YOUR MONZO LABS!!!
Easy Bank Transfer!
Have fun
Edit: Ok, that’s cool, great job everyone, that was the only thing i really wished Monzo had when i checked out Revolut the other day, so easy
2 Likes
It does, check your feed