@anon57579817 You’ve hit the nail on the head. @sausageroll101 your post here really touched me. Your attitude towards money is totally understandable, and it must be hard to justify those ‘treat yourself’ moments!
Self-care is a really personal, tricky thing. But hopefully, having more visibility over your spending (and it looks like you know exactly what’s going on) will make those purchases you want to make more justifiable. In my humble opinion, ‘necessities’ are subjective. Pursuing happiness in a once-in-a-while lipstick sounds more than OK. 
Thank you for your really thoughtful post.